When bad things happen to good people
When bad things happen to good people

My ongoing blog spot. I  will try to update this blog on a regular basis. It is here that you can find out whats going on and how I'm coping with life on the rocks





February 15, 2018

Doing time in a federal prison when a mass shooting occurs can be extremely frustrating. Listening to TV expert panels discussing that we don't need to touch the Second Amendment, after all, guns don't kill people, people
hind guns kill people.

Enough! Is society that dumb to see the dangers that assault weapons have on the innocent? Protecting innocent people is and should be the United States Constitution's goal. And I agree with that assessment. Guess what? There are
doctors, engineers
, researchers in bio life sciences, postal workers, truck drivers, husbands and fathers, all incarcerated and accordingly to strict constitutionalist, against what the First Amendment by all rights allows. None of us cried "FIRE" in a crowded theater. But many of us now realize, we sure did not help the situation to help protect innocent children.

Now why is it so friggen hard to accept that the Second Amendment is not the concrete way of the land and therefore any talk of gun control is off the table? The Second Amendment - right to bear arms, is not a free-for-all. There
are laws in place now, however the laws that are not accomplishing their intent. Innocent children are being harmed by mass shootings because people that should not have access to weapons are still gaining access to these
horrible weapons
. Common sense tells us that change is over due. The writers of the Constitution never thought that something called a computer would allow the proliferation of child pornography with a click of a finger: yet that
click of a computer mouse is deemed to go against the First Amendment because it does cause indirect harm to innocent people. So did the creators of the United States Constitution mean that our society accepts the pull of the

trigger of a weapon that could kill 17 people in a matter of moments? Of course not. If the purpose of the United States Constitution is to protect the rights and lives of it's citizens there is no reason to allow assault weapons.
The Second Amendment does not and should not protect the right to bear all kinds of arms. Really, no one needs more then a hand gun or shot gun to protect personal property. Self protection is within 20 feet to the danger. Any farther, walk away, run away. And for hunting an assault weapon ... where is the honor and sport?

Boy I'm tired of my time of incarceration. And to hear the weak politicians not making any progress towards anything to help justice reform.  “Hey Legislators!”, at least do some kind of gun control. After all, my ex-wife and kids are out there!

If you or a love one seeks the computer for diversions, and hides behind closed doors, there just may be a problem. Please seek help. Talk to your marriage counselor, pastor, someone but please seek help. Pornography
addictions are dangerous as the smart men in FCI Loretto can attest. We are not pedophiles, but we were sucked into an addiction of pornography leading to the depths of hell. People get hurt. Families and unknown children are harmed
by our action. Remember, clicking a mouse has put many a man in prison, shouldn't we curb the opportunity to pull the trigger?


Captain Shipwreck






President Donald J. Trump                                                                               September 5, 2017      
White House                               
1600 Pennsylvania Ave. 
Washington, D.C. 20001  

Dear Mr. President, 


Thank you for being strong and independent. Your Vision will surely make America Great! As you try to bring Washington under control, please look into The Federal Prison system. When you do, you will see, slightly changing its “business as usual” can save hundreds of millions of dollars, without negative impact to the public and at the same time allowing the government to still control federal inmates. Many of these cost can be curtailed by a few minor adjustments bringing the- federal system back in line with most state governments. Parole and reasonable “good time”. 

As you know, O.J. Simpson was recently paroled from Nevada State prison. He followed all the rules and showed remorse in his criminal behavior making him eligible for good time. His behavior also allowed him eligibility for parole after 30% of time served. The Federal government took away such Parole from federal inmates, which then added tremendous additional cost to the 
government by way of hundreds of millions of dollars in unnecessary extra time housing, feeding and costly medical services. 

The government can and will continue to control of inmates through the probation department and if necessary will be able to send those that don't belong outside, back to prison. Nevada allowed O.J. to be eligible for release from his 30 year sentence after 15 years if, and only if, he abided by all the rules of imprisonment by awarding 156 days good time for every year of good 
behavior. 'The federal system only allows about 50 days, or one third of the good time allowed by many states. This is costly and really does not amount to any benefit t other than house, feed and health care .for many who have learned their lesson and are ready to return to society. 

Mr. President, everyone knows that with 5% of the world population and 25% of the world’s incarcerated population, that the United States Justice system is broken. And as you now find out, the elected Politicians are too scared about their re-election than doing what is right. Now if the Correction Officer's Unions want to fight thinking that there will be less housed inmates, thus less CO's, remember, many current Correction Officers will make great Probation officers, which will need to be expanded. However, the major 
savings is less housing, and medical cost. You have been justly elected, to do the right thing and stop wasting tax dollars that are so desperately needed. If nothing else, first time offenders in federal prison are doing excessively long prison sentences compared to states criminal policy. You can fix it Mr. President. 


Captain Shipwreck



Thirteenth Amendment
September 2017

Before I start, two things, one is my heart goes out to the Texas people. If you can, help out by sending to the Red Cross. The second is happy birthday to my estranged ex-wife the mother of my two Children, as well as

happy birthday to my sister that has continued to support my efforts and is so important to me. Now to my post.

Did you know that it was the Thirteenth Amendment that forbids slavery? Of course most people just think that it was done after the civil war, but it took an act of congress to pass an Amendment to the United States Constitution
to set down the law
. But did it end slavery? Look at the Thirteenth AmendmentSection 1. Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.

Section 2. Congress shall have the power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.

So what? SLAVERY exists today, I know, as I sit here in federal prison, I am treated with very little respect and just perhaps, it’s allowed? A few nights ago, around 2 am, I found myself not able to sleep. I was having a dilemma and it bothered me until it dawned on me that this whole 'correction system' has its fundamental roots to the Thirteenth Amendment, once someone becomes a prisoner. I feel like I fell back to the 18th - early 19th century
and no longer have any rights. I have become a sla
ve. I lost any right to expect any kind of compassionate or common communication among staff in a BOP facility. Sit back, relax and while this may be a little long, bear with me.
The following story is 100 accurate. Let me say that my goal is not to name names, as I am sure that those involve believed that they are only doing their job.

I have been diagnosed as having a hiatal hernia, along with some Barrette's Esophagus. I have had stomach problems since I was a teenager. Now, I need to figure out what is best for me. Only I can make that decision.
I am 59 years old, and have made my own health decisions since I was 17 or so, right up to my arrest and incarceration on September 30, 2010. I am now extremely limited in my decision making. I am still wise enough to know what

is in my own best interest, but that means little here. Now the question is whether or not - as the health care administrator says - "Refuse medical treatment". I'm talking about going out for another endoscopy procedure. It
was one year ago that I finally went out for my initial endoscopy

A while back, before my first endoscopy, I was constantly being awaken by acid reflux; inhaling stomach fluid into my lungs. A nasty experience, where I immediately wake up coughing up sputum. I have had this under control for the
last year by medication that the outside physician prescribed
. Before that, I had this under control by medication until the BOP refuse my chronic care medication (end of 2014) and told me that I needed to buy the necessary medication over the counter in our commissary. So, in order for any relief, I had to buy Omeprazole at $12 for 14 tablets. I take two a day. So it cost me around $48 dollars a month. Remember, in prison, if there is no outside help sending money, I make ¢13/per hour. Slave Labor!

Looking at how well my luck has been with my health care during my incarceration, and my own decision making was removed, I seem to have bad luck. This is where I stand. Two major health issues and each one dealt with
incorrect scheduling and unnecessary shackling and transport
, due to incompetence on the part of the federal agencies. In county jail, I had a detached retina, causing sever damage to my right eye. And the second, stomach and esophagus damage due to acid reflux disease; GERDSo let me tell you what happened here at Loretto, and we will discuss the county jail in another article later.

Here at Loretto, I had an endoscopy last year, 2016. The doctor whom preformed the procedure came to talk to me about what he observed. He notified that I had a hiatal hernia, evidence of ulcer scars with evidence of a minor
ulcer at that time
, as well as a polyp that was biopsied. He stated that I needed Omeprazole two times a day, and if in six months I was not better, surgery should be considered to repair the hiatal hernia. When I returned to Loretto, I waited over a week to be called back to medical so that I could receive the doctor's report. I also needed my prescription medications that the outside doctor ordered. When, I was finally seen by my PA (Whom is doing the best that he can), I was told that the BOP was going to give me my Omeprazole twice a day. He then told me that the Doctor wanted to check me out in a year - different than what I was told directly from the doctor. But as I'told over and over again - "hey you’re in prison". Now my story about my recent appointment for my follow-up endoscopy one year later.

I was scheduled for my procedure on the day of the eclipse, August 21stNow I ask you, if after you read this you feel any frustration, or am I just another inmate complaining - you tell me. My intent is not to criticize the systemthat is not my intention, but to tell you HOW IT REALLY IS!

Saturday, August 19, after our chow-hall that is opened at 4:45-5:15pm, as I was reading on my upper bunk when two C.O.'s (Correction Officers) walked in and asked me my name and number. After confirming that I was the correct

person, they asked me to pack my stuff into my locker as I was to be taken tothe SHU (Special Housing Unit used for disciplinary purposes, fighting, illegal contraband etc.) , not for punishment but because of some medical
. They asked if I was aware I had a procedure scheduled, and I told them yes that I had a procedure last year that requires no eating and drinking only the night before the procedure. That was the same procedure I am now
scheduled for
, so why am I being taken to the SHU now on a Saturday? Because that is what the paper work says, to put me in the SHU on Saturday. Ok, I pack up. Since it is not punishment, do you mind if I take a quick shower? No,
there is no time
, and you can take one there at the SHU. I pack up and am led toward the SHU which is just right down the hall way from my central one unit.

When we arrive at the door, I am told to hold up, I need to have hand-cuffs on as I enter the SHU, even though, supposedly no punishment, just a medical hold to monitor my eating before a schedule procedure. I turn around,
arms behind my back and handcuffed. I enter into the sally-port my handcuffed hands behind my back and proceed to a cell where I am to change out of my cloths into the SHU clothing. I enter straight into the cell handcuffed, the
door closed behind me
, my back to the door (do not turn around). The doors in the SHU all have openings (food tray - handcuffing slots) high off the floor,  I have to squat down and slip my handcuffed hands through so that the hand
cuffs can be removed
. I do so. Then I am asked what size I wear, I-X or 2-X, I say either size works. I am told to strip down, hand out my cloths through the slot. Standing naked, I'm told to lift up my lips with my fingers, brush my

hands through my hair, back of my ears, lift up my scrotum, turn around, lift  up my feet, so the Co can see the bottom between the toes, squat and spread my  ass cheeks, all this is done to make sure I have nothing on my to take into
the SHU cell
. After that, I'm handed back SHU clothing. Bright Orange coveralls, orange boxer shorts, a 6X cream colored t-shirt, socks and blue lace less sneakers. Once I put on the cloths, I am told to turn around and put
my hands through the doo
r to be re-cuffed. I squat down, and do as I'm told.  Then I'm told to step forward, still facing away from the door. The door is open and I'm told to back out, and as I start backing out a hand grabs my arm.
Once I back out, "step to the left". I do. The door is closed. I am now led by the arm to the 'bubble' SHU cell, the first cube on the right where windows allow the CO's to see what is going on as they sit in their office.

Once again, standing to the left of the door, facing the wall, arm grabbing my arm, another CO opens the door and I go in. I stop, facing away as the door is closed, the food tray slot is opened and I am told to back up and
slip m
y hands through so that the cuffs can be removed. I do.

My cell consist of a stainless sink, and a stainless toilet. Two bunk beds for a total of four inmates, although there are only three sleeping pads. I find a plastic cup, a package of dental cleansing powder, a short cheap toothbrush, a roll of toilet paper, and a small yellow plastic spork. (combo spoon and fork). One bed roll consisting of two sheets, one blanket, two towels, and a face cloth, and small bottle of body combination soap/shampoo. As I look things over I settle in.

Every 20 minutes or so, the CO's walk down the corridor which I think has about 10 cells on both side. I go to the door as the C.O. is departing and knock on the window of the door, place my mouth up against the grated voice
partition and he asks what I want
. I ask if there is any way he could get me a book to read. There are racks on wheels that contain probably 150 books or so. He tells me he doesn't have a key, so no books tonight.

A while later the health nurse comes through with the various medications for the inmates, and included is a sheet of paper for me stating I am to be placed on a clear liquid diet for 24 hour for a procedure scheduled for Monday

am. Ok, so now I know why I am here on a Saturday and not Sunday. I asked why 24 hours. not just 12 hours like before? Because that is what the paper says!

I settle in. The inmates are rowdy, it being a Saturday night, and it sounds like a hundred inmates are yelling at the same time, but in reality, it is only two to six inmates consistently yelling back and forth about really
important things
. "YO. bro - what u doing?" "I b chilling" "Jays what b Chico say?" "Maaan I don told ya - he b say-n nu t tn " It is a long nigh until things become quiet. probably I am guessing around 1 AM or so.

In the morning I am awaken by the noise of slots opening and breakfast trays being pushed through. Two trays per inmate, one with hot items, the other cold items. When they finish and are about to leave, the slot on my cell
is opened and a St
yrofoam container is given to me. I open it to find five packages of 3 beef bouillon cubes per package. Nothing else. I tell the CO that the list for clear liquid diets includes coffee, and so he goes into his office and brings out about 20 packages of SHU single serving instant coffee packs.

The bouillon cubes are dated Oct. 2016. (Today is August 20, 2017). Must be the date they were made! Instructions on label bring water to a boil, drop cube into boiling water, simmer 5 minute - enjoy! I push the spigot button on the stainless steel sink for the water and tepid water squirts out. Enough to fill the plastic cup half way. These are the same sinks that were in Pinellas  county jail and there are two buttons, one for cool. The one on the right -normally the colder one does not work at all. The one on the left, for warm comes out tepid. I push it over twenty times to see if any difference in temperature, but no luck. With the tepid water, I make a cup of tepid coffee,
putting two single size coffee packets into the ~ cup of tepid water.

Being a Sunday morning, there is a new shift of CO's, surely I will be able to at least get a book to read, after all, I'm not being punished, only placed in the SHU to make sure I follow a clear liquid diet. I ask this new CO for a book. The CO goes off to look for a book for me. This morning CO is OK.
He is trying at least. But he comes back and says he doesn't have a key and nobody seems to have a key into the inmate property room, where the book rack is located.


I try to make some soup out of the bouillon cube when the rest of the inmates are given their lunch trays, and no trays appeared for me. Hey, the list (posted here) does include jello and Boost - the drink, but no, nothing
for me
. After a half hour of sitting in the tepid water, I stir the cube around and hardly any color change in the liquid but there is crud floating on top of the water. I sip it and it’s horrible so I dump it down into the toilet.
The day goes on.

After the dinner trays are removed; again nothing entered into my door, I try again with the water and bouillon cube and let it stand for over an hour, with little bit better results than earlier. I have found that the coffee does suppress any hunger I develop, for a small period of time. Now I'm 26 hour since my last meal. Feeling the headache coming on, I continue to drink coffee for the caffeine which generally helps me with headaches. I also put a note in the window, asking the CO for some hot water so that I could make a decent cup of bouillon. Along side that note for hot water, I put another note for Health staff asking for Tylenol tablets for headache. A CO (2nd shift now) comes pounding on the window telling me no, he will not get me hot water, and also to take down the notes. A few hours later, the Health service nurse comes by  and when I ask for Tylenol he looks at me crazy and says, "No"! I try to change his mind and there was no way without him threatening me that if I wanted a couple of Tylenol, that he would take me out and do a complete
medical work-up (then being charged a $
2 fee). So I declined and went to lie down.

A long night, with a migraine headache. I took my last coffee around 11:30 with three packets of coffee, and ~ cup tepid water, trying to ease the headache with caffeine. It may have worked in a quiet environment, which the
SHU is not
, as the same 4-6 men re-did their whole nonsense conversation up and down the hall.

The early morning darkness gave over to the lightening of the dawn, as seen though my windows into the high walled and fenced in recreation yard. That was followed as the CO's carted the morning breakfast trays down the corridor. As soon as they enter, my own cell door is popped open and a Styrofoam tray is placed inside. I tell them that I am not to eat anything since I have had to stop eating anything. Other than a sip of water with any medication I may

need, (perhaps a Tylenol for migraine headache!) I was not to eat since last night at midnight. "Oh, ah Ok ", and they took my clear diet breakfast tray away. I still wonder if it contained more bouillon cubes.

As the Monday morning wore on, lots of activity was taking place in the SHU. Different department heads coming through the SHU. unit Managers, Counselors, Case Managers, Psychology Department personal, even out Education
. Constantly inmates tried stopping individuals to ask questions and the most common answer was, "I don't know, you need to put in a cop out to so and so". Government workers, nobody wants to make any decision, or give any
. It is always somebody else's problem. Always put in a cop-out and wait for an answer. Seldom did I hear "I'll look into that for you" and when I did hear that, did they really mean it? I don't know.

As I was once again lying down, around 9:40 am, a pounding on the window,
the sign of thumbs up meant that I needed to get ready for my out-side road

During my stay in the SHU the difference between living inside the SHU and outside the SHU in general population, for me at least is like the difference between night and day. What is amazing to me is that for many
, they seem to have the attitude that the SHU is no big deal. But then again, the SHU cell that I was in and the SHU cell that other inmates are in are different. Cells associated with medical hold, do not include a shower.
The other cells include a shower. That is huge. But no cells have moving air circulating through them. As I mentioned before, I asked to take a shower right before I was taken to the SHU only to be told no.

That first night I spent in the SHU I did the old wash rag bathing routine and washed my hair over the sink. It took a while pouring water at a half cup at a time. It works, just not as comfortable as a shower. That first day of fasting, that Sunday, I washed my hair by using the cup over the sink once again. And the third time I washed my hair, was around 6:00 am Monday morning.

I was unshaved, but at least my hair was clean. I took a wash rag bath that morning. Without any deodorant, I took the soap from the soap bottle and with my finger tip, wet the tip of my finger, a drop of soap and smeared it


under my arms. I felt that it was better than nothing. Having no air movement in the SHU caused me to sweat and as I lay there, I could smell my own perspiration. Last thing I wanted was to go to any doctor looking like I don't care about my own health, but when in prison, there is no way to look pleasant, respectable, when you appear in a doctors office all chained up.

There is no maid service, no one to clean up after you leave the SHU cell. When I arrived, the sink had tooth cleansing power allover it. The toilet, the same. Although, I did have to sign a form when I changed into SHU
clothing stating that my cell has been inspected and is clean
. Nothing broken.  Well it was dirty so I cleaned the sink and toilet and when I left, it was cleaned before I left. When the CO arrives for me to exit the cell, I pile up the bed sheets, blanket, all garbage, empty coffee packets, a few empty bouillon cube packs, all next to the door.

Again I go through the routine of turning, back against the door, hands through the slot. Click, click. I move forward as the door is once again opened, back out, arm grabbed and led to the changing cell. Strip down, hand
out SHU clothing through slot
, standing naked - check for contraband, lift scrotum, etc. etc. I am given the cloths that I arrived with to the SHU.
Change and then once again back up to the door
, re-cuffed and led out back from the changing cell. As I'm led to the SHU sally port, the hand cuffs are removed. I enter the corridor without any chains and told that we will go to
R&D (receiving and discharge)

We arrive into R&D and I'm led to another clothing room where I am again stripped down, checked for contraband - (same CO checked me 5 minutes before and I never left his side), then given travel cloths. My cloths are put into a
plastic bag
, along with my own shoes and socks. Everything I wear is given to me to go see the Doctor. I am then taken to a scanner and told to step up onto the sliding pad. I place my feet into the out-lined feet on the base of the
pad, told to hold still
, then slowly I'm sliding towards the right, under the scanning arch. Stopped momentarily, and then scanned back to the left. "Ok step down". I move over to another holding cell. There I have a chain looped and
padlocked around my waist
. Right at my waist there is a fitting looped through the chain where hand cuffs are then looped through. When I'm cuffed, my arms

can only move about 8-10 inches from my waist. I'm then told to sit down on the bench. After I sit, the CO pulls out leg chains. These consist of two cuffs, a little larger than the wrist cuffs, and they are connected by about
24 inches of chain
. Once leg shackled, you have to take small steps. The cuffs wear into your legs so you hope that the socks stay up, providing some protection.

Now I waited until the transport van was ready. When the radio squawks,  we move towards the out-side door and we once again wait for the CO in charge of R&D to open the door and escort us to the first fence. Once let through the
, he walks, I slowly shuffle toward the large gated sally-port where delivery trucks, and buses enter into the compound. There, on the other side of the gate, another CO has paper work and ask me my name, number and date of
, verifying that yes I'm the one authorized to be chained up like a rabid animal and allowed to enter his little domain. Once through the gate, we walk over to where a Lieutenant again checks a list; ask me the same questions,
, ID, and date of birth. Now I'm led to the farthest gate in the sally port where a van is waiting on the other side. Gate is opened. I'm led to the van, where I'm given a hand to step up into the van and sit down. The CO then  buckles my seat belt. Safety first!

I don't get out much. Matter of fact, this is only the second time since December 2011 that I have been on this side of the fence. It is now around 10:20 and if it wasn't for the fact that I have not eaten since 5:00 pm Saturday, 40 hours), I would have enjoyed my trip into town.

One of the things I try to see are things that change. Like the gas prices, different advertising signs, and of course just watching people as they are getting gas, driving through drive thru's. Watching normal people with normal life. Oh, what I would give to turn back time. When we stop at traffic lights, people glance at the van that has BOP markings. Just what do they think? Are they wondering what kind of man is inside? Do they think about the harden criminal, or would any of the people that glance this BOP van realize that the man inside chained, may just be a man that made a mistake. A
mistake tha
t the government over prosecuted and over sentenced. I wonder these types of things. Maybe I think too much.


We arrive around 35 minutes after we left the prison, and we pull into the back and wait a bit. It seems that this medical facility was not expecting us until 11 am. So we wait. There is some talk about the eclipse that is
happening a bit later that same af
ternoon. Unfortunately it seems somewhat cloudy. Hot and muggy we say in Florida.

Time comes and I am released from the seat belt and helped down from the van. One arm leading me I head to the back door where there is a speaker and buzzer. After one CO pushes the button and speaks into the speaker, we are buzzed through the back door where a nurse meets us. "Oh so your here for your office visit?" "No, this man has a procedure scheduled". Strange looks. "Ah,I'm showing an office visit, no procedure". "I haven't eaten for over 40
". "Well, when you have a procedure there’s only an overnight fast where you’re not to eat after midnight". This is not looking good as I waddle towards an office.

Both of the CO's are looking pissed off. They tell me that. they normally do the office visit then wait for an hour or so then they move forward and do the procedure that same day. They really are not too anxious to get back
during this day shift
. As we wait, a nurse comes in with a clip board and ask me questions. If things are the same as last year. Are my parents alive? Any new problems? I affirm that all the medical history is the same. She takes my blood pressure, pulse, and ask if I feel sick or nauseous. I tell her I was nauseous the night before when I had a migraine headache, but that I did not throw-up. She says OK that about wraps it up. And she says that another person
will be with us in a minute
. Ten minutes later, a male nurse knocks at the closed door, enters, and then tells us that there seems to have been a mistake, that the endoscopy was not scheduled today. The C.O.'s  OK if it is not
scheduled we will
leave, but the nurse says he will check to see if they could work something out. Forty five minutes later, no luck, I need to be rescheduled. I'm now still shackled and led back to the van. I mentioned to the CO's that since there was a mistake, surely they would stop by and get me something to eat. "Be a long cold day in hell before I buy you something, they don't give us any money for that".

As we depart, the driver pulls over into the drive through that I mentioned to them before. He orders himself a drink, nothing for the other CO or me. Then we drive off. Next thing I know, we are going up and down a giant

used car lot. The COs peruse the car lot and I am interested too, after all, I got no clue what cars cost anymore. We then work our way back to the BOP facility. Winding through corn fields, forest and past different cemeteries
and lakes
. A 90 minutes return trip.

I am finally un-shackled around 2:15 in the afternoon. Forty five hours since my last meal, all for nothing. After all, the BOP sent me out, with two escorts to an appointment that was for naught. I knew something was wrong when
I was taken to the SHU on a Saturday
, but when you are an inmate; you have no rights - like the slaves.

Trust me. There is more to this story, but what is important for you to know is the federal government means business. Watch what you do. I wish I could go back in time and correct my behavior that caused all this trouble.
But I can't. All I can do is try to warn others. Pornography can be very dangerous to certain people. It became addictive to me and cost me everything I loved. If you look forward to logging in on-line to view free adult porn, be
, before you know it you could be where I am today.

Capt. Shipwreck.



eligion in Prison

Late April, 2017

Easter was last Sunday, our prison meals - so called Tacos for dinner. Nothing special, only what was called for on the National Menu. first of all, I need to make a disclaimer about this posting. I am not  anti Christian, Islam or against Judaism. I do not participate in thactivities at the Chapel because I see too many inmates contradicting what I call religious values. I do have them, and I question why I allowed myself tdo what I did to get here, because my actions were against my own Christian values. So that is why I don't go to the Chapel, no t. yet anyway.

There is quite a bit of goodness that comes out of our Chapel officesServices for numerous religions such as Wicca’s, Hinduism, Judaism, Islam, Rastafarianism as well as Native American services. Christian services are

offered in Spanish. The Chapel also offers classes in various religious studies. Weekly AA meetings, both alcohol and narcotics AA, (not sex addictions) are offered through the chapel. So yes there are a lot of positive aspects of the Chapel and the two Chaplains.

But let me tell you what I see first hand. How I experience many of the so called "faithful" here in a prison system. There is a vast contradiction between what many men of religion preach and how they act towards their fellow
inmates. Many people are phonies when it comes to religion or faith and their actual behavior. Treat all people with respect, isn't that what religion, most religions ask of their followers? Forgive those that have erred? And help out
those who need help? For many, these characteristics are forgotten. What does  happen is that many people hide behind their religion.

Some just want to take advantage of special religious meals along with special commissary items only available as religious items. Like Dates (the fruit) and scented oils, for the Muslims. Gefilte fish and matzo for the
Jewish faith.

One man I know is one of the most racist men I have met. Yet he wants to be called "brother" so and so. I have been threatened by this man and have since completely ignored him for some time. Even though we happen to sit next
each other here in the typing room. I have seen others of one faiththreaten others of their own faith if they do not "fall in line". So much for the forgiving. Others, those who have hands-on sex offenses clutch their bibles, going around saying "God Bless You" yet continue to trade in prison porn.

But it is what it is. This is prison. A life that I never expected to be living. Yet here I am. Because I looked at naked pictures of the illegal nature. I kick myself everyday because of my weakness into falling into an addiction to pornography. That led me to foolish and dangerous behavior which I am ashamed of. So look, if you are reading this, and you think that looking at child pornography is a no nothing activity - think again. It is dangerous. Not only to unknown victims that are abused by others, but also to your own family and friends when the Federal Government comes knocking at your door.
Get help; seek counseling before it is too late.

By the way, the following bible verses are typed by "Brother So and So" and handed out by a few Latino inmates almost daily.

Captain Shipwreck.



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Jesus said to her / "I am the resurrection and
e life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live , "And whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die Do you
elieve this?" John 11: 25-26


But now having been set free from sin, and
aving become slaves of God, you have your
uit to holiness, and the end, everlasting
. For the wages of sin is death, but the
t of God is eternal life in Christ ,Jesus
our Lord. Romans 6: 22-23 '